Today I can see the sun again, after one full week with non-stop rain... Phew! I was feeling like this little mouse here in the picture... poor one, I took him out of the road just 5 minutes before a car came...I hope he survived...but I hope he doesn't find the way to my kitchen...I didn't mind the rain actually, it was a nice, quiet and cozy time for me...I was alone with the nice company of all the cats and dogs of course, so I would have my own rhythm to do what I needed to do...
I realized I need so much time alone with God than I thought I did... I'm just losing the track of time every morning now...I 'm usually getting up at 8am, I go down to feed the cats and dogs...it's always an excitement, as if they wouldn't see me for weeks ! I make my own breakfast too and then around 9 I'm going up again to my hut to have my meditation time... I'm just going through a bunch of teachings I already have to review them... As I do that, God is revealing new stuff, or I´m reminded me of other things that I forgot... it's so cool ... I also realized how much I love this ancient texts we call the Bible... God speaks a lot to me through those stories of man and woman trying to figure out what God is like... I'm glad we have Jesus´ life to bring more clarity about that because humans tend to get stuck in their own interpretations as if there is only one way to see it... It´s true that what we know about Jesus´ life is also in text, but as we develop our own relationship, the Spirit starts to speak to us and we develop our own stories in life with this God who is not only present, but actively present...
After meditating on some text, I just pick up my pen and journal and often I´m surprised with what comes out...sometimes prayers, sometimes questions, sometimes cool revelations and different ways of looking at the text...
When I'm by myself and have no one to really care for or any other responsibility, this is what I love doing, this is what makes me lose track of time... Sometimes, like today, it was already 2pm when I was done...
I am so thankful I can have this time, because this practice does make me a better person, and I feel I can help more people with this wisdom... This is also a good reason to live like this in a community, being able to provide for a small community our essential needs, and having more time to pray, meditate and study...
I need to make more time for these practices even when more people are around... it might look a bit unsocial to some,to be away most mornings, but that would make me such a better person to be around...
It´s important in a community that we have time to develop our spiritual practices and have time and space of our own. I think everyone needs this, otherwise it is not sustainable in the long run... We need to be well balanced and healthy in order to be available to serve others who are in need... If we just give and give without looking after ourselves, we could end up empty and burned out...
I've been having other challenges too...like discipling the kittens to pee and poo outside the kitchen and my house... They are cute but they are challenging my patience to the limit... it´s not easy to make them understand they cannot just pee everywhere there is some soil... because part of our kitchen floor, is soil ( I'm trying to compact some clay now)... my hut´s walls are soil... so , it's hard for me to get them to understand the difference between inside soil and outside soil...
Speaking of hard work, I've been also digging ditches for the water to flow and not to get stuck where it shouldn't... the heavy rain helped me to see where it was needed.
Another good thing about being alone here was that I was able to bathe inside the kitchen in front of the fireplace... it felt so good, and simple! There's something about having a bath, especially in a basin and with a simple soap , that reminds me of childhood when I would spend the summer with my grandparents in a small village in the centre of Portugal, or later on in Angola where I lived pretty much off-grid in the humanitarian organization I served in... At my grandmother's there was a big basin, or maybe that was how I remembered as a child... she always had her fire place in the kitchen on, with a few round iron pots with 3 little legs, where the water boiled super fast... not unlike what I did yesterday here, it felt so good, even if the basin was not that big...little things in life that can bring us so much joy!
1 comment:
oh baba! we will see you soon :-)
i'm glad you are enjoying some quiet and restful time. the rain is good for that.
your bath reminds of of when jesse was small and i would heat water on the stove and pour it into a tin basin and set it on the floor. he would have his bath in the candle light, which sounds very fancy but was just that way because we had no electricity. not so fancy but it certainly was cozy!
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