hApPy hApPy dAy !!!!

Just a couple of days after finishing our strawbale building workshop we had lots of friends and family for a "baby party"... (go to the other blog to see how it all went... it was great!!!)

This was definitely a happy day… a celebration day for many reasons…
For my twin nephews’ 3rd birthday, Nelson and Joshua, and also for Nolan’s 2nd birthday that would be later this month…
We also had little Diogo with us, only few months old, son of Pedro and Lisanne, my sister’s best friends…
And Kiara, Lua’s daughter was also with us…
so, a party with and for children… I think we all became a bit like children, except for the alcohol consumption ☺, but hey, it was a party !!!
Another big big reason for celebrating was that my mom came from Angola ☺ …



Nelson, Edna, Nolan and Lyna(almost out), ready to blow out the candles...

Edna and Lisanne

baby Diogo, Lisanne and Pedro's son

Kiara...Lua's daugther...

my mom was in great form… laughing, dancing and being surrounded by family (what she misses most in Angola)… my cousin Paulinho (below, behind my mom and Pedro who opened the “dance floor” with Angolan music), Ricardo, his wife Nelia , (no pictures of them , tssss…what a shame, it was so nice to be with them)

and Pedro who is like my little brother...they all came to join us…

Orfeu and Diana (hard to see in the far back), friends of Paulo and Edna… (but you can see that Chrissy was still here after the workshop…eh, eh)

and also our other brother, Nico (on the right, next to Lyna and Nolan) wouldn’t miss it…

of course we had to have some german friends around, Miri (from Goerlitz)

and Peter...here giving gelatin to Paulo... it went around till we all tried to eat it with our hands...eh, eh...
Miri and Peter were in Porto visiting Juran and Ulli (their little daughter Fiona was born just few weeks ago, so they couldn’t come this time ) ...
Nuno, our friend who lives nearby also showed up… (below, on the left, near Nolan)...he has been busy with his amazing stone work, check it out here … he's a good friend from us here...

… we can see better Orfeu now, with the tattoos, speaking with Pedro, Lisanne’s husband, and Diogo’s father...(it's better to explain cuz there was another Pedro, eh, eh)

Whitney Hurst (laughing at Emma eating the gelatin ☺…)…Whitney got a lift with Ricardo and Nelia from Lisbon…the rest of the family couldn't come cuz they are busy moving to Algarve...Isaac really wanted to come, but for some last minute reason he couldn't... he would love it !!!

Emma also came from Ireland specially for the party and also to meet my mom…
Wow, what a nice family gathering !!! It’s been a looooong time… It was a pity my dad couldn’t come this time…but I’m sure soon he will ☺ …

Nelson and Joshua enjoying the gelatin my mom made specially at their request...

Nico and my mom showing us how to dance …Angolan style ☺


This was a really special day for me for many reasons as you can see… and I thought this could be a good opportunity to share something that is also very special for me…
It ‘s been a while since I’ve been wanting to write a post about it… I wanted it to be special, and I wanted to write when I had a relaxed time to seat and write … as you know, it’s been quite busy around here lately …

Some of you already know, most of those who were at this party knew… those who didn’t , it was either obvious or they end up knowing after my little brother Pedro make a sort of “announcement” for everyone to hear…

It was lovely actually, but a bit embarrassing I have to say… specially for Emma, who couldn’t help but blush on the other side of the table ☺…
but that’s Pedro !!! he’s always been like that since we were kids…☺
it was sweet as well… I have no idea what he was speaking about but then he turned to Emma on the other side and said something like “ you’re getting engaged into a biiiiiiig family …”
and actually that is the truth… Emma is not only engaged with me, but with this beautiful people, family and close friends, who know me, and are happy with our commitment…
Edna has been the first and the most supportive of our relationship… my mom received the news filled with joy through a letter I sent her to Angola… she was looking forward to meet Emma here and Emma excited to meet my mom… :-)
This was another big thing that made this day special and worthy of celebration… you cannot imagine my joy…
Specially because our relationship has not been celebrated by all of my friends…
Probably one of the reasons why it made me cautious to share it here , or to share with others… it is hard when others don’t rejoice with something that is so precious for me…(unfortunately for some it even seems like someone died or something)
Sharing with some people, close friends and not so close friends, has been mainly a way to start discussions… if it’s right or wrong, if it’s God’s will or not… some don’t even use the “if”, but clearly say that “it is wrong”… without many explanations I have to say… without any interest of hearing our journey, not only together, but with God too… “the Bible is clear” , they say… but when I ask for more depth, I get no replies, or else, I get “teachings” and web sites of “ex-gay ministries” for me to research for myself…
The thing is that I have been searching and researching from the beginning… It was not something I took lightly and easily… it was a confrontation to all that it was passed to me and that I assumed to be “true” in my own mind… it was a huge struggle between my mind, my spirit and my feelings…
From the early start (one and a half year ago) I shared with my closest friends… some of them were rejoicing… yet, others said “it is wrong…the Bible is clear”… so I kept praying and went to the Bible… all the verses I was tired of knowing… I’m not going to make this longer than it is already, but just to let you know that I’ve always struggled with my sexuality, so that was something that would interested me particularly…in my journey with Jesus, being discipled by others, I learned well all the passages that seem to condemn same-sex relationships… I went on the journey knowing in my mind that it was not the best for me… to be honest I didn’t even think about relationships until maybe 4 years ago… I was happy alone with my love with God… so, I really didn’t need to think much about it…
About 3 years ago, when I was opening up my heart for the possibility of having a relationship (of course I had in mind a lovely man and kids, cuz that was the only possible option in my mind to be the “right thing”), I found myself trapped … I had feelings for a woman… “Oh no”… it was a big struggle… I felt ashamed, with guilt and condemnation… I had conversations with my best friends and my prayer partners in this new season of my life (the past 5 years), and they challenged my mind saying that there is nothing wrong for me to love a woman… but I couldn’t handle it , it was out of question in my mind…
Time passed… more than a year… and again my feelings were awaken… but this time was not another woman… it was Emma, my best friend since 5 years… she had come to the land for a month after finishing her master’s dissertation…
And a loooooong journey was about to begin…
I don’t want to get so detailed here… but all this journey led me to seek God as never before… to study in depth the Bible as never before (and I can tell you that the Bible is not at all clear about condemning same-sex relationships)… and above all , to realize God’s amazing love and grace, as never before… understanding the meaning of the cross as never before…
Accepting the biggest challenge of my life… to be truly me… a broken vessel filled with God’s love …
“embrace your feelings” was all I could hear from God in the midst of the storm of all my thoughts… of course I resisted it time after time, cuz “that couldn’t be from God”… “feelings are deceitful”, how could God ask me such a thing?
The honest truth is that , when I surrendered to that invitation, I felt God’s love as never before… I felt God’s acceptance as never before…
I was aware then, and at the same time, Emma was also aware, that this journey would be a long one… and a hard one …
On the other hand, Emma was also praying about it all… God challenge for her was different… in a picture, God offered her a cup, and asked her “would my love and Barbara’s love be enough for you?”… she knew the cup was filled with joy, but also pain… (thankfully) she said yes to God…
And we said yes to one another… ☺
We got engaged last year, and we will celebrate our union and commitment with our friends and family (if all goes well) next Autumn !!!
After that, Emma will finally move to the land… it has not been easy to be distant, and all those who experience that will know what it costs… but our love grows stronger and deeper, and we are looking forward for the steps ahead…

I want to thank all of our friends who have been faithfully supporting us… our families and their love and acceptance… we’re also thankful for those who don’t really know what to say or how to respond… we're thankful for all those who have been challenging us by sharing a different opinion, who have actually strengthen our conviction and our commitment to share a different point of view as children of God...

Above all, we're thankful for God in our midst... another clear picture we have from the beginning... walking together, hand in hand with Jesus with us and along side us...